• Miracle: God Breaks Derek Jeter’s Ankle To Give Detroit Tigers Victory

    October 15, 2012 10:44 am 24 comments

    New York, New York - Citizens of New York, tremble before the power of God!  In the image above, you can see your precious pretty boy and Captain Derek Jeter flails and falls before the might of the Archangel Michael.

    Derek Jeter may be toned and powerful beyond the means of a normal man, but look here and you can see he’s no match for the power of God.  The torment and anguish upon his face is one of realization:  he comes from a city of sin and now is being punished.

    God does not approve of the Sodomy Megalopolis your city has become, you burrough dwelling slicksters.  With all your tax breaks and posh apartments in the sky, it can seem you’re above the law and edict that stems from the heartland of America, or what you so preciously call ‘fly over country’.  But God has given a Midwest values, hardworking city of Detroit favor and you can see they lead you now 3 - 0 in the championship series.

    Sure, Detroit is not a perfect city.  Their mayors are always corrupt and GM is owned by Obama!  But when compared to a team that destroys sportsmanship by buying up all the good players from my favorite city and others, using all their New Yorker Monopoly Money, it can’t help but make God and the rest of us a little frustrated.  How rational is it to have Derek Jeter, A-Rod, Ibanez and Ichiro on the same roster!

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    About The Author
    Reverend Clyde H. Higgins You're all sinners in the hands of an angry God, a spider dangling over the burning flames of hell and only protected by one silk thread. God has scissors ready and hates those who spin webs of sin.

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