Pope Benedict XVI Retires Just In Time To Star In New Disney Star Trek Wars Film
The Pope in make-up for new Star Trek movie
We all know that the Catholic Church is a cult that is attempting to ruin the lives of true Christians by commit horrible acts of child abuse and worshiping the mother of Jesus rather than Jesus himself, that is a proven fact.
The Pope has a wardrobe malfunction during his resignation speech
Many people don’t realize that it is also run by Obama and his Illuminati cronies. The proof has finally come out though. Recently, the current Pope decided to resign. At this same time, Disney, a known member of the Illuminati, announced the filming of new Stargate films. Coincidence? I think not. Just look at the top picture.
The Pope enjoys a Marijuana cigarette to take a break from forgiving child molesters
There is no way that Pope Benedict XVI could possible clean up all the child abuse scandals while also starring as Emperor Teal’c in a new Stargate: Trek Wars film. These are indisputable facts, but what is going to happen to the Catholic Church now?
Rumors have begun swirling about who the new Pope will be. Some people are saying it will be a black or Mexican, likely from the Mexican state of Brazil. Brazil is over 80% Catholics. The African-American tribes in Africa are approximately 74% Catholic, and America has about 68% Catholics here. So, who will be the next Pope? We had the Foundation for a Better Tomorrow put together a survey of American Catholics about who they hope will becoming the next Pope. The results are below.
#1. Pope George W. Bush the 1st.
We all know that this was the greatest President since Ronald Reagan. While he is not a Catholic, but an actual Christian, making him the new Pope could help turn this cult into an actual Christian religion, and would definitely help end all wars on the planet.
Possibly the best candidate for Pope
#2. Pope Oprah Winfrey aka Poprah
Having a female Pope would be a first, and having a black for Pope hasn’t happened since the middle ages when the Cardinals accidentally elected a monkey wearing a robe to be Pope. Making Oprah the Pope would make a lot of people believe that the Catholic church has moved out of the 1600s and into the 2000s, that could really help them out.
First black female Pope ever.
#3. Nick Cage
Nick Cage is an action movie star that not many people have heard of, but he has made such wonderful family films like National Treasure, Windtalkers and G-Force. He may not be very well known yet, but this up and coming movie star might just give the Catholics some star power finally.
He will steal the Catholics back to a true Christianity quicker than he stole the Declaration of Independence
#4. Rupert Murdoch
The founder of FOX News would give the Catholic church a much needed Fair and Balanced approach to reporting the truth about what is really going on in its cult. Below are some new magazines that they could produce under his watchful eye.
A Guide for Nuns.
or:
A helpful guide for new Altar Boys
Whoever becomes the next Pope, let’s all pray that he helps rid the Catholic church of their affiliation with the Illuminati and Obama, and returns them to a true Christian lifestyle. God bless you, and stay safe.
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Author: Bruce Myron Danus
Years of Mental Gymnastics, and lots of love from Jesus has made this man realize he was not "Born this Way", but instead chose to be a Homogay until he met God and realized God doesn't make mistakes like a homogay.
6:55 am
Damnit Bruce… I ‘ve Pointed this out to you before… Star WARS, StarGATE, and Star TREK are three, completely UNRELETED THINGS…
And the picture of “Emperor Teal’c” or whatever is actually a picture of Emperor Palpatine… A character played by Ian McDiarmid… Also, Emperor Palpatine died in Return of the Jedi…
Let’s see… What else…
That picture of the “waldrobe malfunction” is just the Pope with Borat’s lower body photoshopped in…
Bad photoshop of the Pope holding an oversized blunt…
I can’t even begin to point out the racism of ” when the Cardinals accidentally elected a monkey wearing a robe to be Pope”
Nicholas Cage is actually a very well known actor… I don’t know what makes you think he isn’t… He’s been in a lot of well known movies… A lot of them aren’t that good (The Ghost Rider movies… Ugh… They were terrible…)
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6:14 pm
I could have seen this one coming…
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4:47 pm
I think that you pointing it out is what drove him to write this article.
Pure stubborness.
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7:35 am
Wait so Oprah is good now you keep changing it so much i forget when they are good and when they are evil.
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7:31 pm
Announcement In case anyone wants to know I will be in Lichtenstein for two months with family and learning Swedish
Oh and my sister will be taking over her name is Sasha she is a la veyan satanic and will mention it a lot she curse worse then anyone I have ever seen or met she is lesbian and is a wh*re at all times and has no care for your feelings hates Christians believes that Christianity is xianist and has and will tell. Why she hates the bible what she does to bibles and she will talk about gay and lesbian culture more then anything oh yeah and loves to piss people off and can drink 5 bottles of vodka and not pass out and the aggressive kind to so have fun and yea I hope you like it as much as I do
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8:18 pm
Tell her to make her own account. It takes about five seconds.
Have a nice trip.
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1:11 am
I didn’t even read that, all I’m saying is that, the boy on the bottom is SEXY!!!! oh my god. and he looks like my friend
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9:54 pm
Many people don’t realize that it is also run by Obama and his Illuminati cronies
I stopped reading right here
1. Obama is Not even an illuminati and he doesn’t even run the Vatican Vatican is it’s own country
also History 101 The Illuminati were enemy of the church
because it,s was mostly philosopher and scientist
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1:44 am
Testing….
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8:27 pm
At least yours showed up…
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1:47 am
Hello?
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8:12 pm
Yeah… the Vatican is its own city, Pope Benedict retired because of failing health, you have to be a man to be a pope, Nick Cage would be a horrible pope,and you have no idea what you r talking about
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