• Andy Biersack Donates 100s Gallons of Blood

    May 16, 2013 9:43 pm 1 comment

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    Andy Biersack has once again proved his dark powers and mystically donated over 100 gallons of blood to the Red Cross. The shocking news story is burgeoning all around the web and has many of us good people terrified: how is Andy Biersack able to create so much blood?

    Andy Biersack and Puts Christians in Como, sipping on the spilt blood of their fans mixed with Starbucks X3 mocha. They call the drink “Human Expresso” and your son/daughter provide the main liquid ingredients.

    Andy Biersack must be the direct descendant of Vlad Tepes, the Count Dracular of ancient lore. I warned everyone of this fact long ago.

    When reading old tales of Dracula’s power and magic, you will fun into stories of how he would burn his enemies and smear their ashes all over his body and face, much like Biersack does to this very day. A man of weird tastes and fashion, he would strap himself in all sorts of weird leathers and unusual hairstyles for a proper man. Then, on top of that, he would feast on the liquid of his followers, so as to become ‘immortal through them.’

    The photo evidence on the right very clearly shows Andy Biersack screaming something fierce while his bandmate, Puts Christians in Coma, mouthfeeds him their favorite drink called “Human Expresso”, a form of liquid soylent green packed with espresso beans and caffeine.

    The energy drink gives Biersack the power to conduct concerts and all the bizarre brainwashing techniques passed down to him by none other than his great, great grandfather, Vlad Tepes, the count Dracula.

    Biersack has consumed the blood of over 89% of people who attend his concerts. When all the music starts, they become brainwashed and cannot even remember it happened. So when you go ask your son or daughter if that is true, do not be surprised when they say ‘no’. because they will not remember. That is what makes it so dangerous. You should have them tested for rabies.


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    Abe If you don't like what you just read here you can just get out of my country. Now how about that smart-alack. Follow me on twitters. Poke me as your New Friend on Facebook!!

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