Whenever I see a cute, wealthy lesbian, I get depressed. If I were just a few years younger and not a married man, I would like to court Ellen DeGeneres. That nice smile of hers and she always is just so generous to the people in her crowd. And she is funny. She’d fall in love with me and we’d have all sorts of cute strawberry blonde children.
But it is not to be, because Ellen DeGeneres doesn’t like men. That is the only reason she would turn down a fine, healthy man of morality like myself and you too.
In the video below, we can see that lesbianism is contagious. Ellen met up with another cute woman, Kate McKinnon, and within a day she had her trained on all the classic lesbian qualities.
Here we see them wearing East Coast semiformal, doing the two-step. This move is known to make lesbian women tighten up in their knickers and lick their chops, because of the cadence and rhythm of the thighs and feet. How did McKinnon become a pro at this one so fast?
Here McKinnon does the wild money maker routine. She ‘drops it like it is hot’ just like you see on all the Yo! MTV raps videos. But then she comes up clean and shakes herself all around. Look at Ellen debate on ripping off all her clothings right there on set.
The spread’em chair swivel. Now here you can tell Ellen is the more experienced. Look at how she is like an Olympic gynmast on the pomel horse. She is just swiveling all around and you can imagine that practice marks perfect here. McKinnon still does the spread as if a man will be invited, but Ellen is more prim and proper, seated so that a women can provide pleasure unto her.
This is the sort of things I imagine happens in sorority houses at colleges all across the nation and at “Girl’s Night Out”, which is why I forbid my daughter and wife from doing these things, respectively.