Scooby Doo, The First Atheist Brainwashing Cartoon Reviewed

Scooby Doo. What a show. ~AtheistScooby Dooby Doo is an atheist propaganda cartoon that reached its zenith during the turbulent, drug-fueled 1960s. The show featured a talking dog, a marijuana addicted hippie and three ‘free love’ college students who frequently engaged in off-screen coitus, without the bounds of marriage.

On the surface, the show purported to be a simple, fun buddy adventure archetype where four friends and their Great Dane dog engaged in riveting investigations. Parents felt comfortable letting their children watch a repurposed Sherlock Holmes, with teenaged college students being the protagonists.

But parents of the 1960s and even today could not understand the true agenda of this show: anti-theist brainwashing.

In each and every episode, the ‘villains’ of Scooby Doo turned out to be people of faith. They dress in costumes that suggest an afterlife or belief in a higher power, to only be defrocked and defrauded by the heroes of the shows, representations of very anti-theist values.

To get a full understanding of just how damaging and sneaky the show is with its agenda, a breakdown of the core characters and mores each episode espouse.

1. Scooby Dooby Doo

Scooby Doo and his buddy “Shaggy” caught hotboxing, right in the middle of an episode.

The name of the show’s titular character should send off alarm bells. A “Dooby Doo” is slang for marijuana. The main theme of the show was performed by the Doobie Brothers, a troupe of musicians who performed stoner music to set the mood for endless parties where participants did all sorts of illegal drugs and had drug-fueled pregnancy inducing sessions.

Scooby always has an insatiable appetite, one of the primary symptoms of marijuana addiction. The CDC reports that since the 1960s, America has seen an 84% increase in teenaged obese population. The obesity rates increase most dramatically in demographics that have access to a television where Scooby Doo airs in syndication.

Even beyond all the drug references in Scooby Doo’s existence, the dog also represents the dangerous concept of evolution.

Evolution is the belief that humans evolved from monkeys, who evolved from lungfish, who evolved from bacteria who all evolved from a ‘magical’ Big Bang that apparently started all life.

Scooby Doo climbed the evolutionary ladder in this show, regularly showing abilities beyond that of a dog: in the show, Scooby Doo showed impossible abilities for a dog, such as: talking, solving a mystery, eating sandwiches that contain onion, drinking chocolate milkshakes. The impossibilities go on and on, further destroying the facts of life for children. A dog cannot eat onions or chocolate, a dog cannot talk and a dog cannot independently solve crimes or roller-skate.

2. Freddie

Freddie is a bisexual swinger who cannot get enough free love, no matter in what he’s sticking his sinning wick. Freddie is all about carnal pleasures and often invites Daphne, who wears an easy access dress, to go to exotic off-screen locations with himself so he can give her a shaggie. This teaches young men that is is okay to deflower your daughter, as long as they do it off-screen and away from your knowledge.

 

Freddie also wears an ascot, cementing his position in the homosexual sexual community as a Yankee Doodle Dandy. Dandies are men who oft dress in the highest New York fashions, attracting attention of struggling college students who will likely give them whatever they want, just for a few dollars for food or tuition money.

Freddie is obviously the rich, older homosexual of the group. Compared to everyone else, he is well-dressed and manicured, two distinct symptoms of being a Yankee Doodle Dandy. All of the characters have to give into his demands, even though his preference is likely shagging Shaggy.

3. Shaggy.

The best way to characterize Shaggy is to think of internet website Reddit.com, then think about what their typical user looks like: unwashed/unshowered, on drugs, scraggly, sleep-deprived, perpetually hungry and in some form of college, where they could be an honor student but due to poor time management/turning tricks for their Dandy Daddy, they struggle to keep passing grades.

Shaggy happily eats a pile of sandwiches earned after marijuana-fueled buckling session where he let Freddie have his way with him.

4. Velma

Shy and quiet on the surface, dominating and luring underneath, Velma is the lusty library fetish character of the show.  While she always provides an excuse to get on her hands and knees with a famous utterance of ‘My glasses, I cannot see without my glasses,” we all know Velma’s cries of “Jinkies!” is some weird safety word that gets Shaggy, Freddy and Daphnie all excited.

With the all knowing glare and adjustment of her glasses, there is an 80% chance that this character is also promoting lesbianism.

5. Daphne

Finally, we get to the belladonna of sensuality herself:  Daphne.  Like all red-haired women, this Daphne is a dangerous vixen whose sole purpose it is to lure men into doing sin.  For the ascot-wearing Freddie, it must be awkward to take all of his passionate feelings toward the unclean shaggy, on a cleaner, more attainable Daphne who is always fresh, ready and willing.

Did we ever once see her turn down a ‘Well, you three go mess around over there while Daphne and I check out the hot sauna.” ?

Comments

54 Comments on "Scooby Doo, The First Atheist Brainwashing Cartoon Reviewed"

  1. The Mystery Machine represents all that went wrong with America during the late 70s.

  2. Wait….. What?

    Your god and religion is so weak it is scared of a cartoon? Have I got that right?

    Bugger me sideways, the world has just stopped. (I bet this comment doesn’t get on this website)

    Love and peace

    Steve x

  3. Cassidy Pen | June 27, 2013 at 3:54 am |

    Scooby Doo is nothing but a poor man’s Speed Buggy, anyhow.

  4. First yall bash my bands for being “satanic”
    then books

    but freaking scooby doo i mean really what is wrong with yall?

  5. Gee, another big steaming pile website. This writer is a complete loon and some REAL insane childhood issues. Get some therapy guy. I’m laughing all the way to church man….. and I hate church.

  6. more proof that religion is a mental illness

  7. You need to take your meds, dude. You’re as half baked as a day old scooby snack.

  8. So this is why cartoons today are not nearly as good as cartoons use to be…

  9. Oh so Scooby-doo will do damage to children but all those pedophile priests will help them, right?

  10. I love how the author calls out Reddit, then is immediately verbally thrashed by reddit. haha. oh, the irony. it burns… like holy water to an atheist’s skin.

  11. Mmmhmmm, someone has a fairly thorough knowledge of naughty stuff and it aint from 50 shades of grey. Considering what y’all drew Velma as, I’m thinking someone is liking the naughty librarian fetish.

    Overall and amusing writeup though.

  12. don’t even know what to say about this.. It’s just ignorant and judgmental in every way. So next time you here about Christians being stereotyped as such, just read this again and you’ll know why. Seriously? ‘off screen sex’ it’s a cartoon there is no off screen for scooby, or shaggy. They’re drawn and computer animated, they’re not off somewhere smoking a blunt right now.

  13. Dumbest thing I’ve ever read… Including the bible…

  14. Maybe y’all are the sick ones for assuming all this. What you watched an episode of scooby doo. Got some sick arousal out of it was ashamed of yourself, and now you want to blame scooby. What’s really going on?

    I’ll tell you what….
    Jinkies.

  15. Rusty Yates | July 18, 2013 at 2:43 pm |

    I think Scooby Doo is winning.

  16. This site is hilarious. The sad thing is that there are probably numerous christians that think this is a real christian website. Kinda like The Onion being real news. Keep up the good work, you magnificent bastards!

  17. Stupid nonsense

  18. Bring Scooby back! It’d be a hoot to see it after all these years. Might help explain the children of that era.

  19. This is the greatest thing I have read in a while. Still not sure if his being serious or not, hard to tell…

  20. Chakolate | July 18, 2013 at 6:54 pm |

    Thank you so much for bringing this evil Satanism to my attention. Why, I’ll bet that if, after they pulled the mask off to reveal a human, they could have pulled another mask off to reveal Ol’ Scratch himself.

    Shocking, that’s what it is. Just shocking.

    Bless you for your wonderful work. It’s inspiring to see someone so well able to read such minutia between the lines of this so-called ‘children’s show’.

    You have a deft hand, sir.

    • justin1999999399 | July 21, 2013 at 3:43 pm |

      talking snakes, giants, killing of innocent ppl cuz of a dif of religous views, mix clothed shirts bein a trespass worthy of damnnation all came from the bible not scooby doo 😉

  21. There is no way anyone here can say Velma and Daphne are not fetish characters, Freddie isn’t a financially sound elder homosexual and that Shaggy is not a stoner. And what dog on Earth can eat onions? Seriously, folks, get back into reality.

    • The Sky-God | July 19, 2013 at 5:47 am |

      Is this site a comic pistake on Christian fundamentalism or really for Christian fundamentalism? Its hard to tell the difference.

  22. Mickey Bruce | July 18, 2013 at 8:42 pm |

    nice research… “reached its zenith blah blah drug fueled 1960s”? the show didn’t even debut until late Sept 1969. but of course, facts never matter to christians.

  23. Are you high? Or are you just stupid?

  24. I thought it was pretty funny that the author put ‘magical’ in quotes before big bang. The bible’s explanation of the origin of existence literally is magic. God used magic and poof, life. It literally had me laughing hard.

  25. Please tell me this guy is joking. If not, I give up. Humanity is doomed and we are probably better off that way. I am pretty sure the cockroaches will have a better chance than us when they develop a sense of humor (and evolve to use roller skates and drink shakes!).

  26. Wow, we got Poe’s Law all up in here.

  27. Ludicrous nonsense!
    Even if the creators really did design all those messages into it, it doesn’t change a thing about the world we live in.
    And we didn’t come from monkeys, we have the same ancestor you dumbass!

  28. Holy hell, buddy. You are a psychiatrist’s cash cow. Of course the cartoon is about a bunch of 70s kids who get stoned and screw. This isn’t news. However, what’s interesting about your article, is your own closet homosexual deviant perspective. Wow, do you have baggage. The way you describe Freddy, Velma, and Daphne is especially fascinating. It’s clear you hate Velma, because she’s the strong female type, so she must be a lesbian and therefore off limits to you. I have to wonder though, who gets you harder, Daphne or Freddie? Or is it both? Buddy, you need to get those urges out of your system or you’ll join the rest of your christian brethren in screwing little kids and hopefully rotting in jail for it. Do yourself a favor and explore your sexuality. Your future wife (or husband) will be glad you did.

  29. I’ve never seen this site before. Is it a joke or parody site? There was never a “Dooby” in the name of the show or the dog, and the music, far from being a product of the Doobie Brothers, was created by David Mook & Ben Raleigh. The former worked with Burt Bacharach and Hal David and created other cartoon music, and the latter, born 100 year ago, wrote songs for such non-hippy-degenerates as Eddie Fisher, Nat King Cole, Johnny Mathis, Aretha Franklin, Bobby Darin, and Dinah Shore.

  30. Charles Oakey | July 19, 2013 at 3:57 pm |

    If a snake can talk in the Bible why can’t a dog talk in Scooby Doo?

  31. This author obviously has no idea how to cite sources to PROVE what he says. And talking dog = CARTOON. Loony.

  32. this is irony right? please… ley this be humor…

  33. I don’t care what the nutcases think about scooby doo or what they think some of them portray, I think it was the best animated mystery show on TV. It has nothing to do with atheism. Religion has messed up society and pushed aside the truths of christianity.

  34. This is the dumbest thing I have read in a while.

  35. God here, i created all things , “The big bang, Evolution and cartoonists!”

  36. Glenna Kachtik | July 19, 2013 at 10:53 pm |

    WOW! I remember watching Scooby Doo – I missed the sex completely!!!!

  37. Glenna Kachtik | July 19, 2013 at 10:56 pm |

    This wasn’t meant to be real, right????

  38. “Magical” big bang? How about a “Magical” man in the sky? LMFAO

  39. You know religious fanatics as well as non religious fanatics are always going to find some insane reason to jolt children programs. Get over it. Both sides are damning the imagination of children regardless. It’s sad that in order to prove a point both sides are willing to put children in the middle of it. All children cared about was that it was a funny cartoon and most likely helped with thought of “There are no such things as monsters.” NOT what this crazy article is attempting to portray.
    Daemon King

  40. Craige Litz | July 20, 2013 at 8:51 pm |

    (this is the dumbest article I’ve read in a long while) I guess people see what they want to see. Your version is tainted with with a sad judgmental bias. It must be horrible to perceive the world through that lens. btw, it was never called scooby “dooby” doo…

  41. justin1999999399 | July 21, 2013 at 3:38 pm |

    I would buy the “this is a sattire” argument if this popped up on a site not geared towards conservative right wing christians. was this article written for the chive or the onion i would laugh my ass off at it. unfortunately, alot of ppl that prob frequent this site actually believe his argument. i love the constant contradictions, is freddie a hetero man whore constantly banging chciks or is he gay???

  42. g2-e683b6320940d6f96d9c59dee91109e5 | July 21, 2013 at 7:22 pm |

    Chuckle. Scoobey Doo was presented for public consumption by Hanna Barbara purveyors of meaningless schlock. Even what you found that was there you misinterpret. The hippie character, for example, was mocked. The fact you find so much in there in such a shallow toon is a joke. HEY! I can do that with Mary Had a Little Lamb. “Had?” “White as snow fleece?” COCAINE! And the stalker lamb obviously has carnal relations with her.

  43. Wow, this article is retarded.

  44. “drug-fueled pregnancy inducing sessions”? Oh my gosh, I haven’t laughed this hard in along time. This is totally ridiculous!

  45. Holy cow. These people have way to much time on their hands to read all sorts of non-existent rubbish into a cartoon. Oh wait… They do that for every aspect of their lives.

  46. This , and this whole site , must be a joke , can’t be real .

  47. The idiots on here who think this is real

  48. You’re the type of christian that makes look bad and make it even harder to bring people to Christ, way to go…

  49. Wiccanandproud25 | February 22, 2014 at 10:48 am |

    And what is god oh a supernatural genie in the sky

  50. To the author: Bro, you see the mess you have made with your attack on our Scoobie? Believe what u want to, if it blows your hair back. Live and let live and stop trying to find the devil in everything… try looking for God in everything instead… you would be surprised!! be still man and pass the joint or is it a scoobie (really!!!???)

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