Iran wants war with America. Today they have further proved this fact by attacking our new golden boy Hollywood director, Ben Affleck. Affleck won movie of the year for his direction of Argo, a story about how American freedom is for all the lesser countries. Argo takes a painful look [...]

As many of you know, I have recently been on a World-wide missionary trip. I have traveled to many faraway and exotic lands, bringing clean drinking water, technology and, of course, Christianity to the squalor of these third world countries. The truly amazing thing about these places is how happy [...]

There are many different conspiracy theories about this recent meteor attack on Russia, but Christwire has discovered the truth. First, let me debunk all the “theories”, and then I will tell you what actually happened. Many of you are already thinking that I will say it had something to do [...]

My fellow comrades: I have come across some dazzling new information about the X and Y Pokemon games and what they contain. They contain vile homogay creatures that will teach our children and teens that homosexuality is OK! It is not OK with me and my church! These X and [...]

We here at Christwire have been fighting against racial profiling for years, but it still exists. Below, I will point out the “Danger Factors” of each Sand Sniffer, including a color code for the “simpler” users to understand. Going from 5 to 1 here, but they are all just important [...]

Comrades, I bring you news of the political world of things in regards to Miss Hillary Clinton being ill. Her office staff was kinda enough to let us know that she is recovering from the Japanese stomach virus called pokerus. One can catch this virus simply by eating oriental foods [...]

Egyptian President Morsi has just declared himself a New Pharoah, boasting sweeping new powers that include glowing eyes, invincibility and ability to make others bend to his will with just a shake of her serpent staff. Such powers are terrifying and immoral, yet somehow after nearly 2,000 years the Egyptian [...]

My most loyal friends, Mitt Romney has been challenged by the communists most recent invention, Giant Crabs, fighting for control over the good old USA. Mitt Romney being the fair patriot he is has risen to the challenge and taken on the commies and their silly animal invention. The brawl [...]

Dearest Comrades It has come to my attention that the pokemon black and white 2 games are teaching our children the modern warfare tactic of genocide. With the recent release of the pokemon black and white 2 games, children and teens have been face down in a constant stare like [...]

My Most Loyal Comrades: This is the last straw for me regarding pokemon creator, Satoshi Tajiri, and Nintendo Studios teaming up together to brainwash our children! They’ve crossed the line with the pokemon creatures. Earlier this afternoon, Nintendo Studios revealed that in addition to the new Wii U device coming out on November, 18th, [...]

Ontario, Canada – Tensions continue to grow between America and our North Mexican neighbors, this time after a heinous, long-term plot of the Canadian army was revealed by the CIA. US military operatives tracked secret shipments of maple syrup, Canada’s prized export to the US, from Quebec to News Brunswick.  For [...]