8 Steps To Being A Better Illegal Mexican

November 14, 2011 12:15 pm56 comments
8 Steps To Being A Better Illegal Mexican

I was just shopping for groceries at my local Wal-Mart, as I was leaving there was a little mexican kid laying on the floor crying in mexican jibberish at the check out lane. I thought to myself, “The Gaul of these mexicans! To come here illegally and and then be [...]

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Remember the One Chinese Woman, Chen Xianmei, Who Dared Help a Girl Want Yue Ran Over by a Van? She’s Just Been Kicked out of her Home

October 21, 2011 5:51 am8 comments

Scrap peddler Chen Xianmei being harassed by Chinese government and neighbors for rescuing a little girl named Wang Yue after she was hit by a van and left to die by over 18 passerbyes in a Chinese street.  Chinese claiming Chen Xianmei “only did it for attention”, even though she had [...]

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Has Men’s Tennis Become Dangerously Homoerotic?

October 4, 2011 9:41 pm46 comments
Has Men’s Tennis Become Dangerously Homoerotic?

Since the days of John McEnroe and Bjorn Borg, there has been a strong current of masculinity in men’s professional tennis. Boys have long viewed these athletes as brotherly role models while women have appreciated them as icons of virility. Recently, with the rise of Latino and Mediterranean practitioners of [...]

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Pineapples and the dangers they pose to your christianity

October 3, 2011 7:45 pm30 comments
Pineapples and the dangers they pose to your christianity

Great, tasty, nice pineapples seem harmless enough,Right? But have you ever seen the blooming flower of a growing pineapple? It’s the Star of David, the Jewish Religions symbol, not in similarity, but an extreme replica. Another note on the growing evil appeareance of the pineapple is that someone has sold [...]

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GroupOn Deal-A-Day Sites Destroy American Economy

September 5, 2011 5:43 pm26 comments
GroupOn Deal-A-Day Sites Destroy American Economy

I don’t know about you, but my emails has been taken over lately by companys such as GroupOn and LivingSocially. For those not familiar with such evil organizations, let me briefly describe how they supposedly work. Basically, its generally small businesses run by hardworking Americans that get suckered into partnering [...]

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China Behind Fall & Resignation of Apple CEO Steve Jobs

August 25, 2011 7:26 pm49 comments
China Behind Fall & Resignation of Apple CEO Steve Jobs

By now, most of you have heard that Steve Jobs, co-founder of Apple Inc. (APPL on NASDAQ), home of the iconic iPhone, iPad, iPod, and Mac products, abruptly resigned August 24, 2011, citing mounting health issues from the pancreatic cancer he has been battling for years. But is that all [...]

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Chinese Rioters Brutalize Innocent Black Catholic Students from Georgetown University

August 19, 2011 1:14 pm72 comments
Chinese Rioters Brutalize Innocent Black Catholic Students from Georgetown University

China is once again persecuting human beings and this time, the dragon’s mouth has come for American flesh. China is an atheist country and naturally has no morals.  It is a place where females are ritually killed so as to leave more supplies for the growing male army Chairmain Hu [...]

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Chinese Wrestling Federation Forces Haruka Children to Fight Adults

August 17, 2011 7:25 am12 comments

The following story is a heartbraker. As if we needed more reasons to holy nuke the Chinchankees, we find yet another reason today.  As I awoke to find more horrible stories to warn you about, not even a week’s worth of clonidine and ativan could have prevented my outraged anger! [...]

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Satanic Hipster Tao Lin Makes Sinful Snuff Film “Mumblecore”

July 12, 2011 1:54 am28 comments
Satanic Hipster Tao Lin Makes Sinful Snuff Film “Mumblecore”

Movie Review: Mumblecore by Tao Lin and Megan Boyle Rating: S (for Sinister) for atheism, interracial kissing, twiddle rompus sex acts, heavy drug use, gambling, violence, irony, autism and subtitles. Have you ever heard of a “snuff film”? A snuff film is a Satanic video where a real person’s life [...]

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A Guide To Spotting Illegal Mexicans.

July 11, 2011 3:16 am74 comments
A Guide To Spotting Illegal Mexicans.

As the unofficial Christwire expert on illegal Mexican immigration I have written several articles on the subject. Especially as several states in the southeast (Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina) create laws to turn the tide of illegal immigration into their states. These laws are often very controversial but are seen by [...]

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Kate Middelton Yellow Dress Reveals Hoochiemomma Bum

July 10, 2011 2:57 pm48 comments
Kate Middelton Yellow Dress Reveals Hoochiemomma Bum

We can see that someone has been taking fashion tips from flussy queen Michelle Obama. After having a laying saddened eyes upon the delicate truffles of rump of Kate Middelton yellow dress upskirt photos, I weep and fall and prayer warrior knees to pray for soul of this young woman. She is [...]

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The Nazi Boys of Brazil Return, with Superevil Magnetic Powers

11:55 am7 comments
The Nazi Boys of Brazil Return, with Superevil Magnetic Powers

X-men is an evolution-agenda comic series where people with fantastic powers sweep through the sky shooting African lightning and handcrafted soundscreams that can frustrate even a honey badger’s tough ear, all while a terrestrial assault of the mind by a telepathic handicap and his menacing menagerie of costumed masochists subdue [...]

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“MASS EFFECT/ERECT 3″ – Urgent Parent Alert!

July 7, 2011 12:07 pm147 comments
“MASS EFFECT/ERECT 3″ – Urgent Parent Alert!

God willing, please remove all children under the age of 30 from the kitchen before you read this article. It contains extremely offensive and sinful contents and is a warning to fathers and mothers everywhere. If you haven’t already moved the computer to your kitchen, do so immediately. The kitchen [...]

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Chinese Continue To Infiltrate American Culture

11:23 am75 comments
Chinese Continue To Infiltrate American Culture

Friends and followers of Christ, we knew the Chinese were a possible military threat from abroad. Recent revelations from the ever-vigilant investigative journalists at Christwire have revealed that the Chinese are intent on snaking their way into American society, brainwashing our children and converting us from a Christian nation to [...]

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China Declares War On America

June 30, 2011 4:53 am37 comments
China Declares War On America

I am extremely terrified of Chinese people, but I am not racist.  You should feel the same way too. Not even a year ago, I went before Congress to warn everyone this day would come.  I joined thousands of others in protest to beseech our Christian nation declare an invasion [...]

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