New York’s Health Department today announced that if you engage in homosexualist backside dallying, you need to be vaccinated for meningitis. This adds to the already long list of Gay Bowel Diseases caused by the sinful act of poo-pushing. For years, we at Christwire have warned of the consequences of [...]
Gay Agenda
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Will Russia get Alaska back because of gay marriage?
Doggone it: Barack Obama’s gay-friendly policies could put the Iditarod in Russian hands. FOR many years worried...
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Gays Refused Flowers and Cake… By Jesus
Who is the real victim here? Recently, I wrote about a bakery in Portland, Oregon that was being unfairly protested,...
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Tim Tebow stiffens himself for new thrust; no longer soft on gays
Straight arrow: Tim Tebow merely enjoys wearing tight-fitting clothes. AMERICA’S most...
Gay Teen Worried He May Be Christian
Vidalia, Calif - Lucas Faber, aged 18, was like any other young man making the transition from high school to college. Robust and primed, virile and passionate, excited to spread his wings and fly from home, the fresh buck yearned to make his stake in life as he lived the [...]
Read more ›Is Jose Canseco A Homosexual?
By Mark E. Figs Jose Canseco: MVP of the GayHomosexual Sex League Rippling muscles under tight fabric, the flexing of oily skin conjuring images of a large anaconda thrashing about wildly, a tan hue over the perfectly constructed body mass — I’m not describing hardcore gay “felching”, rather the poetic motion of [...]
Read more ›Furries, Bronies, Porn and Ponies: Signs of a Culture in Decline
By Eunice W. Trends in social media reveal increased deviant behavior towards animals, cartoons and fantasy creatures. This maladjusted epidemic has infected the bloodstream of our American nervous system, it is unsightly and it aches the heart! Tumblr is a magnet of voracious hedonism, Twitter and Facebook equally self [...]
Read more ›Top Ten Worst Christmas Toys : Let Christ be your Shopping Assistant!
Here at The Institute for Moral Consumerism, we’ve spent countless hours researching the latest hot toys to hit the market, just in time for the holidays. The ladies at church ask, ” Eunice, why would you spend eight weeks locked in a cellar with 3,000 inappropriate toys?” Why, you [...]
Read more ›Uproarious Old Mitt Warms Heart of Joe My God’s Gay Voting Bloc
In order to win the upcoming elections, we’ve established that Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan will have to land the crucial gay voting bloc. It’s no question that gays are today’s bread and butter spread for sliding through a tough, tight election and coming out on top. If Obama continues [...]
Read more ›Enlightened 21st Century Hipster Homo’s are… Beyond Gay (See Video)
Growing up there was no such thing as “hate speech” so you couldn’t get arrested for calling an Asian person a Gook. No one would’ve considered calling the police because some Nancy-Boy got called a Fag. Nor would the cops have taken time from their busy routine just to go deal with a name calling incident.
Read more ›Antoine Dodson Admits “Chick Fil-A Chicken More Important that Being Gay”
Chick Fil-A has found a way to cure gay in black people. It can take the dantiest of black chocolate and turn it into a heaping pile of chocolate thunder. Mr. Gay Black 2011, Antoine Dodson, is a man of great distinction. Many remember how he valiently saved his sister [...]
Read more ›Is Joe Paterno the Harvey Dent of Football?
Mother tells me that football has been a part of America since its beginning. In our hubble beginnings, we used football to communicate with American savage Indians and civilize them. When the euro tyranny of Great Britain was brought down on us we used football as a tool to fight [...]
Read more ›“Avengers 2″ film will force homosexuality on children.
The film “The Avengers”, which is about a group of superheroes (demons who believe that their magical powers are stronger than Jesus) trying to “save” the Earth. The film was produced by the increasingly evil and homosexual Disney Corporation as a way of promoting the use of magical powers. It [...]
Read more ›Disney contepmlates making a movie with Gay characters, next step towards acceptance.
Disney studios, having worked with many people in the past who were openly homosexual admits that they are a “gay friendly” company. This is a good step towards the new generation to not tolerate, but accept people for who they are. Isn’t that what being Christian is all about? Serving [...]
Read more ›Notorious Archgay Daniel Tosh Makes Rape Jokes, Is Daniel Tosh Gay?
The two presiding bishops of youthful homosexuality, Daniel Tosh and his sharebear, Paris Hilton, cuddle under pink cashmere sheets and predictably read rape jokes and watch AFV internet clips of dogs mounting children on their green candy apple Apple notebook. All the fanfare will lead to another night of coital calamity [...]
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