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    Kardashian Baby Name North West

    by Mike Collins - View all comments

    Kanye West and Kim Kardashian chose North West as their female child’s new name.  Someway, somehow, Kim and Kanye managed to surpass all ridiculous names like Lakwenita or Turkey Butterball and come up with a name so bad that you know every red-haired bully is just waiting for that first day at Belair Academy, where they ask North what it’s like to have Santa Clause always looking for her. If I went to a strip joint in the Antartica, I […]

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    Mobile Pokemon Snap Camera Game Coming To The Gameboy 3DS

    by Sandra O'connor - View all comments

    Dearest comrades, I hate to say it but the pokemon company, Nintendo Studios and Gamefreak Studios, have once again teamed up to bring the world of the pocket monsters mobile to the Nintendo Gameboy 3DS. It was stated in a recent article found on HyruleCentral.net that the new Pokemon Snap Camera Game will be coming the Gameboy 3DS. The link for this kind of madness can be found here: http://hyrulecentral.net/pokemon-snap-3ds-2/ This is the same system that will be releasing the […]

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    Pokemon X and Y Game Titles To Trick Teens To Spawn

    by Sandra O'connor - View all comments

    Dear comrades, The recent release of the new pokemon games has raised many questions to concerned parents all across the globe. New pokemon games mean new dangers to your children and teens. With each pokemon game Nintendo Studios releases new subtle messages within the circuits of the game are enticing your children and teens to do and act upon horrible things that would astonish you. In the last few games there were subtle messages of homodandy backstage kissing in caves, […]

    Miley Cyrus New Twerk Video Proves Exactly Why Kids These Days are Horrible

    by Cadence Appleton - View all comments

    Miley Cyrus’ new “We Can’t Stop” video shows why the student cohort of this generation has waning values, judgment and respect for themselves, others. I was in Wal-Mart the other day, shopping for groceries and picking up a few items for a BBQ this weekend. A young woman walked up to her mother and asked, “Can I have this?”. It was one of those new, oversized Coca-Cola near two-liter bottles that they sell for $1. The mother said something like, […]

    AMA Rules Obesity Is A Disease

    by Adam Nelson - View all comments

    America is the most obese country on Earth. From people using their rotund bellies as makeshift tables to Paula Deen adding a smidgin’ of pure lard by the short ton to her cakes, America has grown accustom to lifestyle and habits that lead to body fat accumulation. Today the American Medical Association (AMA) ruled that obesity will be classified as a medical disease. As such, any person who is ruled medically obese is now a diseased individual. While the classification […]

    George Zimmer Fired, Outrage!

    by Rachel Aschner-Barsky - View all comments

    You are going to like the way you look. I guarantee it. In my voice, that phrase means nothing, but you take the grizzled voice of George Zimmer, and those lines become an iconic part of America’s fashion history. Men’s Warehouse founder and chairman, George Zimmer, was given the boot today. While an official reason is still not released, many believe George Zimmer did not agree with the company’s board of directors. And what do you do to a company’s […]

    Man of Steel Review From Critic Who Doesn’t Have Head Up His A$$

    by Dan Nordgren - View all comments

    “Reason #1 to see Man of Steel: Kryptonians Ride Dragons.” -’Chubbs’ Spencer. The Man of Steel sores over the weekend with nearly $200 million global box office, yet there are critics who whine and complain about one of the greatest retellings of the Original Superhero. If you are a fan of action, excitement and a good summer movie, stop reading this review of Man of Steel right now and head to your local theater.  If you are lucky enough to […]

    Watermelon Oreos And The Temptations of a Black Man

    by Right Reverend Darryl Brown - View all comments

    I woke up this morning with a Facebook friend linking me the image above:  “You are gonna’ love these watermelon oreos, Daryl!” Well, I will say this:  I love me some watermelon, and if loving watermelon is wrong, I do not want to be right!  It is juicy, good and delicious.  But when you pair the goodness of watermelon with sweet vanilla skin of a Oreo Cookie, how could I resist?  Right? Wrong. I think this is just simply preposterous.  […]

    Scooby Doo, The First Atheist Brainwashing Cartoon Reviewed

    by Adam Nelson - View all comments

    Scooby Dooby Doo is an atheist propaganda cartoon that reached its zenith during the turbulent, drug-fueled 1960s. The show featured a talking dog, a marijuana addicted hippie and three ‘free love’ college students who frequently engaged in off-screen coitus, without the bounds of marriage. On the surface, the show purported to be a simple, fun buddy adventure archetype where four friends and their Great Dane dog engaged in riveting investigations. Parents felt comfortable letting their children watch a repurposed Sherlock […]

    Mermaid Hoax, Disproves Evolution or Elaborate Cover-up?

    by Amber Vos Savant - View all comments

    A mermaid hoax talking point has been created by media opportunists, trying to debunk and disenfranchise viewers from Animal Planet’s hit series, Mermaids: The Body Found. Since the launch of the series last year, numerous stories –worldwide — have surfaced that seem to prove the validity of an aquatic species of humanoid life forms occupying the planet. In contast, numerous experts have come forward, seemingly determined to disavow any story suggesting that mermaids exist and can be real. Most recently, […]

    God Smites Satanic Musicians As A Warning To Satanic Atheists Everywhere: “REPENT NOW!!!”

    by Bruce Myron Danus - View all comments

    In the past few weeks, multiple deaths of “musicians” from the 80s have been reported. While there are many rumors surrounding these deaths (spider bites, liver failure, drugs use, auto-erotic asphyxiation, etc…), the facts are quite apparent: God is smiting these heathens for promoting Satan and Atheism, drugs using, sex before marriage, allowing blacks, illegal Mexicans, women and gays to vote, drive and get married, and many other abuses of His perfect Christian Nation of America. America is at a […]

    Antoine Dodson Says “I’m No Longer Into Homsexuality I Want A Wife”

    by Cadence Appleton - View all comments

    Lincoln Park, Alabama – Antoine Dodson chose to uncome out of the closet today. In a shocking statement on his Facebook page, Dodson reveals that he is cured of gay and he wants to find a wife. Yes Antoine Dodson, who achieved internet fame via a news blooper that went viral after a musical remix, says he’s no longer gay. Says Dodson in a post on Facebook: I have to renounce myself, I’m no longer into homosexuality I want a […]

    Marijuana Fungus in Capri Sun Respawns Man’s Lungs?

    by Cadence Appleton - View all comments

    The next dangerous evolution of marijuana is upon us. Kush doctors, also referred to as ‘ents’ (ear, nose and throat), have confirmed their latest experiments to grow marijuana in the human lungs as a success. By scraping the trichome fungus of marijuana into aluminum wrapped pouches of Capri Sun, Ents developed a ‘cultivating station’ where marijuana fungus could thrive, hidden to all authorities. Once the curing process (the scrog) is complete, the ents state that their subject ‘chortled’ the packet […]

    God Strikes Midwest With May Snow, Gays To Blame

    by Cadence Appleton - View all comments

    God distributes the weather patterns so as to make a rainbow color appear on meteorologists reports on the 4:00 pm news. God was giving a warning that the following day, he would strike down everyone’s plans for a nice, warm Spring. Only one day ago, the weather in Kansas looked fabulously gay. God gave the symbol of the rainbow on weather charts, giving us a 24-hour warning and clear sign that the weather was about to change. The rainbow symbolizes […]

    Miley Cyrus Racy V For Vajayjay Photoshoot Bends Gender Lines

    by Cadence Appleton - View all comments

    First it was Britney Spears who frolicked about Los Angeles busy as ever, with her best Lex Luthor haircut. Then Emma Watson cut her hair short and decided to shine off her beaver cleaver, confusing all ages of men in the process. Now we see the onus of racy responsibility has fallen upon the noticeably broad shoulders of Miley Cyrus. View this image › Image by Mario Testino for V Magazine View this image › Miley Cyrus is doing the […]