Five family-friendly Eletronic Dance Music diddies that your kiddies will love.

Paris Hilton attending the Magic Hollywood Mint Billabong Hooka Rave in Santa Monica, California.  All 46,300 people were exposed to dangerous addictive hooka ethyrs and marijuana droplets, precipitating massive gyrating balls of flesh and illicit perversion that typifies these raver events. Horrible news for ears and parents worldwide, as a new [...]

Adam Lamberg, the Father of Modern Emosexuality  Eyes squinted in homosexually induced conjunctivitis of the eye, like a newborn escaping a musky birth canal emosexuals have their red, crack-bugged eyes streaked with the dark mascara masks of a gonorrhea-toking raccoon. The father of the modern emosexual movement is Adam Lamberg, [...]

As if we needed more proof of how ‘chart-topping’ electronic dance music can be created with horribly crafty Audacity filters and a $20 Windows Movie Maker plugin, we see Rebecca Black’s awkwardly dancing friend (the homegirl to the left) has made a new music video. httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ywo8H_Tz5eY&feature=player_embedded We also know that statistics:  [...]

Mike Watson may be contacted at The Holymailbox or his facebook for questions and addendums regarding this shocking story. Eyes perpetually glossed with the most addictive marijuana residues and spirits all but defunct, the mouths of naive Electronic Daisy raver chicks chirp open in sexual glee as they wait to [...]