Swifties Celebrate Video That Allegedly Shows Taylor Swift Shrank Kelce’s Manhood

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Taylor Swift’s media war against Republican men has surpassed the wildest dreams of liberals, but now it looks like they are taking collateral damage.

In a new article from TotalProSports, reports purport a newly surfaced video proves the theory Republican men have loudly championed for an entire NFL season: Taylor Swift is to blame for all of our E.D. and decreased sizes down below.

We bravely shared our sorrows and tribulations, with women responding with mockery and calling us things like ‘Captain Tini Weeny’ and the ‘cutest lil’ snowflake’ and that was all just hurful. It is so emasculating to be robbed of football, but then to have all the commentary doubling down to body and hormone shame our lower T levels is just downright dispicable.

But now the shoe is on the other foot, as captured by TotalProSports:

Last week, I shared my memoir and podcast where I shared the shrinkage I have experienced down below from all of this, just like so many millions of other Republican men who have had their manhood robbed by all the football coverage of Taylor Swift on ESPN and the Super Bowl. Now that the shoe may be on the other foot, hopefully there will be some nice compassion and understanding.


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