Newborn Mother Irate With Doctor After He Tells Her To Not Take Lords Vain in Childbirth

Spread the Holy Word

A doctor is in hot water after a newborn mother reported the doctor told her ‘Do not use the Lord’s name in vain’ as she screamed uncouth pronanities during childbirth.

First reported on, a harrowing summary of a post to the Am I The Atheist (AITA) subreddit, the post details:

“I (28 F[emale]) gave birth to my baby 2 weeks ago.”

“I was in labor for close to 30 hours and was incredibly exhausted.”

“My doctor was great the whole way through and I never had any issues with him.”

“Towards the end the pain was unbearable, I couldn’t have an epidural due to a heart condition and I felt like I was on the verge of passing out from the pain.”

“During an awful contraction, I said ‘Jesus f**king Christ.’”

“My doctor looked at me and said ‘Please don’t use the Lord’s name in vain.’”

“I quickly responded with ‘Go f**k yourself’”

“My doctor didn’t say much for the remainder of the birth.”

“Afterwards, my husband told me maybe I should apologize.”

“I didn’t, but now thinking back on it maybe I should have.”

“I feel pretty guilty and am considering sending an apology note to the hospital.”

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So Is She The Atheist?

Naturally, yes, any person who takes the Lord’s name in vain is betraying God. The doctor should get awards and thank yous for looking out for an immortal soul and reminding his patient to keep her spiritual body healthy.

The doctor could have gone above and beyond by telling the patient ‘You are in my thoughts and prayers’ to see if that helped her child-bearing pain out or even better, he could have quickly ran down to the gift shop and bought a generic Get Well card. All the patient’s care team could have quickly signed and put their own personal ‘Thoughts and prayers’ message in the card to perk her right up and decrease the child bearing pain from a good 10 to at least a 7 or 8.

But at the end of the day, this story is a reminder that if you do the deed, women are cursed with an eternal punishment to experience pain during childbirth. The book of Genesis very clearly states that since Eve was the original sinner, all her daughters –aka every woman– is supposed to experience some pain during childbirth as restitution for disobeying God but also tricking Adam into sinning and making all of humanity suffer.

Epidurals are sinful because they apparently help relieve the pain. Saying the Lord’s name in vain just from a little child-bearing pain would be the same as a rebellious teen cursing their parents because they get the car taken away for a weekend after staying out at the Friday night football game too late. You don’t curse your authority just because you are punished for a crime.

Vote: Yes, this poster was the atheist. She showed either lack of Biblical knowledge or defiance against it and understanding that childbirth is a woman’s atonement for original sin. If anything, she should be cursing Eve for eating that apple and canoodling with Satan in unholy ways in the Garden of Eden.


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